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10-11-2006, 03:14 AM
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A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush....one fried in a bucket with potatoes and biscuits is worth $12.95 at KFC Relationships is the only thing that has kept men and women from killing each other off a long time ago. If life gives you lemons, make lemon-aid.....If you don't like lemon-aid then I don't know what advice to give you. If it isn't broke don't fix it....just take it apart until it is broke then you can worry about repairs. Anything that can spill, will spill.....Murphy's law when giving kids red kool-aid in a room with carpet. Love is a four letter word sent from heaven to worry the other place out of you. If it doesn't fit, force it. If it still doesn't fit try a hammer or better yet a chain saw. The date on a container of sour cream doesn't mean a thing. Its already gone bad before you buy it. Why is it called an eggplant? Hey Darwin! If man decended from monkeys and apes. Why are there still monkeys and apes? Which boils faster? Hot or cold water? Who cares as long as my mac and cheese is done by the time it says on the little blue box. Well thats all we have for today. Please thank Thelonious Monkey for the awesome post that put a stupid idea into the childish mind of a person armed with a keyboard. Disney, Toontown, The CCG, and anyone else not mentioned, are registered trademarks belonging to their respected parties. Some of the fore mentioned may not endorse or take claim the same beliefs as the statements in these articles. These post are made solely for entertainment purposes, carry no claims for accuracy, and shouldn't be read by anyone. Any simularities of people both real or fictional in these post are actually intended and done so only out of fun and are really respected in the highest manner by the writer. Please take the time to rate this thread in whole and not by a single post within. How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if you stuck its round head in a square hole? Bunny has escaped from the disclaimer!! Last edited by Static; 10-11-2006 at 10:48 AM. 
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10-11-2006, 09:13 AM
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Dude your posts have cracked me up for days, You ROCK MY SHOX. i really do think this should be stickied! it really does remind you what toontown SHOULD be about. Truly Haveing fun. And im glad to say your bring that to this board post by post. I would give you 100 thumbs up if only i had them. But until i DO have 100 thumbs, which i will have surgecly added, I give you TWO thumbs up. (if only it was possible to have a 100 thumbs *goes off into a luxurieous day dream*)
rodrangerofdark
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10-11-2006, 10:58 AM
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10-11-2006, 01:03 PM
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10-13-2006, 09:41 AM
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Flippy, our Toontown Mayor, has declared a state of emergency after three of the Toontown National Guard Soldiers he deployed to police this area dissappeared shortly after midnight. Jellybeans were fired as a dark figure emerged from the water wearing a tie-dyed shirt and a white hockey mask but it seems that they did little to no damage. We have just recieved word that Pixanator, along with President Mickey boarded ToonForce One just one hour ago and are presently flying toward Camp Disney in Florida where they will remain until Thursday the 19th. Disney, Toontown, The CCG, and anyone else not mentioned, are registered trademarks belonging to their respected parties. Some of the fore mentioned may not endorse or take claim the same beliefs as the statements in these articles. These post are made solely for entertainment purposes, carry no claims for accuracy, and shouldn't be read by anyone. Any simularities to people both real or fictional in these post are actually intended and done so only out of fun and are really respected in the highest manner by the writer. If you own a tie-dyed shirt I would be careful wearing it today. Do not for any reason wear it AND a hockey mask.
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10-13-2006, 04:35 PM
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Donald's Dock
I would like to state that before I read this post I was in Donald's dock for a very short time today. It was a regular zoo there. There were Dogs, and Cats and Bears and Rabbits and Mice all milling around. I was a duck, nothing unusual with ducks being there. There was even a blue horse for crying out loud. I left quickly.
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10-15-2006, 06:45 AM
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Hee hee
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10-15-2006, 07:16 AM
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Also one I forgot to add..... Some people continue to breathe day after day only because its illegal to make them stop breathing Last edited by Static; 10-23-2006 at 02:14 AM. Reason: spelling, what else?
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10-22-2006, 03:00 PM
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New Product!!
We here at Toontown Eyewitness News would like to take this time to talk about a new product that has recently hit the shelves in most of the shops around Toontown. I know you have all heard the sayings "Its the best thing since sliced bread" and "This is something that you just can't live without". Well, we here believe that those saying hold true to this NEW product.
As we have seen time and time before, some toons are always telling those uber type toons that they stink which makes everyone believe that they smell just like the north end of a south bound toon and vice versa. Well this new product is the cure all for that. It is a deodorizing, air freshing, color conditioning, aerosol soap that is also ozone friendly, biodegradable, and comes in a recycleable can so small it can fit in your pocket so you can take it any where you go. Its so simple even a supernoob can use it! Just spray a little on and jump in any pond and your stinky day is taken care of. Now you, can have that extra confidence to pack into a crouded elevator and not worry about being the only toon standing when the elevator doors open. This product is so gentle that is can be used on even the smallest toons and since it is also pet safe you can even use it on your doodle. BUT THATS NOT ALL! For a limited time, if you are one of the first 1000 toons to get this product from Clarabell out of the Cattlelog, you will get not one but two cans of Stink B Gone, a coupon to pass on to one of your stinky friends, and a t-shirt sporting the words "I don't stink so it must be you!" Get yours TODAY! Disney, Toontown, The CCG, and anyone else not mentioned, are registered trademarks belonging to their respected parties. Some of the fore mentioned may not endorse or take claim the same beliefs as the statements in these articles. These post are made solely for entertainment purposes, carry no claims for accuracy, and shouldn't be read by anyone. Any simularities to people both real or fictional in these post are actually intended and done so only out of fun and are really respected in the highest manner by the writer. Please use this product only as directed. Using this product or any other product will NOT make you a better Toontown player. The best cure for stinky parts by far is still a shower with real soap and water!
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10-22-2006, 04:54 PM
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Ha ha ha ha!
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Deputy Dynowoof - old spice high endurance user - gosh, why can't my uber learn to bathe.
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10-22-2006, 07:37 PM
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I'm surprised my dog doesn't look at me a lil more odd than she already does when I sit here and laff at the computer. In the immortal words a friend always tells me "Love ya!"
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10-23-2006, 12:19 AM
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Senyor Conejo here, after much time roaming the streets of Toon Town, I have seen some real heartbreaking actions taken against some of our up and coming and well seasoned UBERS as well as future CC1's and I have come up with this MORAL of a story:
A mouse looked through the crackin the wall to see the farmer and his wife open a package. "What food might this contain?" The mouse wondered and he was devastated to discover it was a mousetrap. Retreating to the farmyard, the mouse proclaimed the warning. "There is a mousetrap in the house! There is a mousetrap in the house!" The chicken clucked and scratched, raised her head and said, "Mr. Mouse, I can tell this is a grave concern to you but it is of no consequence to me. I cannot be bothered by it." The mouse turned to the pig and told him, "There is a mousetrap in the house! There is a mousetrap in the house!" The pig sympathized, but said, "I am so very sorry, Mr. Mouse, but there is nothing I can do about it but pray. Be assured you are in my prayers." The mouse turned to the cow and said, "There is a mousetrap in the house! There is a mousetrap in the house!" The cow said, "Wow, Mr. Mouse. I'm sorry for you, but it's no skin off my nose." So, the mouse returned to the house, head down and dejected, to face the farmer's mousetrap-- alone. That very night a sound was heard throughout the house like the sound of a mousetrap catching its prey. The farmer's wife rushed to see what was caught. In the darkness, she did not see it was a venomous snake whose tail the trap had caught. The snake bit the farmer's wife. The farmer rushed her to the hospital and she returned home with a fever. Everyone knows you treat a fever with fresh chicken soup, so the farmer took his hatchet to the farmyard for the soup's main ingredient. But his wife's sickness continued, so friends and neighbors came to sit with her around the clock. To feed them, the farmer butchered the pig. The farmer's wife did not get well; she died. So many people came for her funeral, the farmer had the cow slaughtered to provide enough meat for all of them. The mouse looked upon it all from his crack in the wall with great sadness. So, the next time you hear someone call out for help and think it doesn't concern you, remember --when one of us is threatened, we are all at risk. We are all involved in this journey called TOON TOWN. We must keep an eye out for one another and make an extra effort to encourage one another. So whenever you see someone who has ever helped you out JUST LET THEM KNOW HOW GREATFULL YOU ARE. REMEMBER: EACH OF US IS A VITAL THREAD IN ANOTHER PERSON'S TAPESTRY; OUR LIVES ARE WOVEN TOGETHER FOR A REASON. One of the best things to hold onto in this world is a friend. IN THE LIGHTER SIDE OF THE NEWS THE WHO CARES SECTION Goofy Diet The Walt disney Co. has announced that it will halt the use of its name and characters with food that does not meet nutritional guidelines for sugar, fat and calorie content. "Except for Dumbo and Pumbaa, the gassy warthog and other toons here on Toon Town" said an overly animated Disney V.P.. "These characters, who are overweight or suffering from some pretty bad stomach problems, are probably already eating McDonalds" Disney, Toontown, The CCG, and anyone else not mentioned, are registered trademarks belonging to their respected parties. Some of the fore mentioned may not endorse or take claim the same beliefs as the statements in these articles. These post are made solely for entertainment purposes, carry no claims for accuracy, and shouldn't be read by anyone. Any simularities to people both real or fictional in these post are actually intended and done so only out of fun and are really respected in the highest manner by the writer. Please remember we were all created the same....in Toon Town Central Last edited by raiderfanforlife; 10-23-2006 at 12:20 AM. Reason: grammer
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10-23-2006, 01:56 AM
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I would like to add a little something that I wrote quite a few years ago to that. A Promise to a Friend
I promise to stand in front of you To protect and shelter you To fight with you against all harms And to fight for you when you no longer have the strength to fight anymore For If you are hurt, I bleed also I promise to stand to the right of you To laugh with you at the things that you find funny To smile and share in your accomplishments And to have pride in everything you do For if you are happy, I smile also I promise to stand to the left of you To be there with understanding and a shoulder to cry on To always be there with a helping hand And to help hold together everything that seems to be falling apart For if you are sad, I cry also I promise to stand behind you To help push you up lifes biggest hills To not give in when you say "I can't" or "I'm too tired" And to carry you if you ever loose the will to even try anymore For if you are victorious, I win also I promise you all this and much more because.... It was you that had the strength to fight when I had none It was you that took pride in the accomplishments that I have made It was you with the shoulder to cry on when I thought all was lost And finally, it was you that carried me when I had all but given up on life For this, I will always be your friend Last edited by Static; 10-23-2006 at 10:04 AM.
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10-23-2006, 04:06 AM
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Mooo!
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PS: Mayor Flippy IS the devil, beware!
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